Dating etiquette for young men
Of course, there are two sides to any story, including this one.Case number 1: A young fashion-world executive who describes herself as a “post-feminist” recently went on a first date with an investment banker. The meal was good, the conversation fine, and when the bill came to the table, placed equal distance between them, he reached for it, read it and said, “Okay, your share with tip is 9.” Right or wrong, the lady was angry. Like thwarted intentions and undelivered communications, nothing can cause greater upset than unfulfilled expectations.
I’m sure she would love to hear about that time you rescued 17 puppies that were careening towards a waterfall during your most recent white water rafting excursion, but conversations are a two way street.
We could all learn a thing or two from the men of the “greatest generation,” especially the importance of dating intentionally.
If there’s one thing we modern men seem to struggle with, it’s indecisiveness. So rather than setting a goal, like marriage, and pursuing it with gusto, we meander around, taking our time, waiting for some undetermined sign to reveal to us how we should proceed. We might even get serious and talk about marriage, but we are afraid to commit.
The second man asks the first, “Why do we even bother? But it’s a rough-and-tumble world out there, and good manners seem to have been an early casualty.
We see what happens when the media finds any act of courtesy between the sexes: It’s like spotting an animal in the wild, it is so rare, and the good news goes viral whether it’s Prince William holding an umbrella over the Duchess of Cambridge at a film premiere on a rainy night or Brad Pitt opening a car door for Angelina Jolie in Malta (or heralding it an act of chivalry when Russell Brand doesn’t seek everything he could get under California law in his divorce from Katy Perry.)On subways, buses, elevators, and in other situations where we encounter others we do not know, many men will not follow the “Ladies First” rule because they have been told it might come across as chauvinistic, that just because you are female, he thinks you need his help.